DCMOVIEGIRL'S BELOVED GOOD-BAD MOVIES

There are certain movies I KNOW suck on a certain level, that I nonetheless love.

This is list of them.

No, these are not guilty pleasures, because I don't feel a lick guilty about liking any movie...Uh, maybe for that other thing I did last week, but never for loving a movie.

If you think it's a stupid list, two words. Coal. Diamond.

Now, this list is in no way complete and they are not in any kind of real order. All you need to know is that they are all beloved by me. :D


THE BEASTMASTER



Wanna hear the nerdiest thing I've ever done?? Well, I have Marc Singer's autographed photo, up in my apartment, because of THIS MOVIE.


WHITE CHICKS

I just needed an excuse to post this again. :D



But really, this movie rules in every way possible. And somebody, give Terry Crews his own movie, already!


FLASH GORDAN



Flash! AAAAHH!! Do I really need to say more?

Okay, well... There are fetishes on parade, the bore-worms, winged men somehow flying without really flapping their wings (including one HUGE, swarthy guy, with big white teeth and impressive enunciation skills), and a soundtrack by Queen!


DUNE



I love this big weird whispery, Lynchy, film.

So, maybe you're thinking "And how can this be, DCMovieGirl?"

Well, my answer to that is...

"...For he is the KWISATZ HADERACH!"

So says the creepy toddler nun, so say we all.



RED SONJA



Between that amazing little Filipino kid, the Arnold Schwarzenegger presence, and Bridgette Nielson's off-sync scream of fury at the end "Gedren!!! Where ARE YOU?!", this movie is gold.

FYI: I hear Robert Rodriguez is planning on remaking this with his girlfriend Rose McGowan.


LEGEND = Tim Curry is a giant red demon. That's all you really need.




LETHAL WEAPON 3



Why Lethal Weapon 3, you ask?? Well, there are the armor-piercing bullets, the semi-creepy shave-bonding scene between Glover and son, the inappropriate Boyz-to-Men song usage, and one of my favorite onscreen couples bonding over bullet wounds and their mutual love of The Three Stooges. O.T.P.

Sooo, romantic. :D


PREDATOR 2



I actually love this sequel better than the original...Mainly, for Danny Glover hobbling around after the Predator in the L.A., Busey getting chopped in half by the Predator's version of a *glave, and for that cool-ass ending.

Did y'all spot the Alien trophy on the ship?? I do believe that's what lead to the comic-books and ultimately crappy movie sequels.

Plus, I've got this theory, that Predators are the "black" space aliens (well, them and Klingons)...

Think about it.

They have dreads, they have the brother walk and stance. And who survived, earned their respect, even received gifts, bonding, and initiation?? The two black leads.

See?
*see my entry on Krull to see what that is.


THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW



I have a thing for disaster movies...yes, even the crap ones.

And y'all, they outrun THE COLD. You've gotta love that.

SAVE THE LAST DANCE



Yes, it's a white girl in the hood movie, but dammit, I love it. Julia Stiles is a little stiff, but she's got rhythm when she dances to the groovalicious soundtrack.

Plus, you get to marvel at the wonders of a weave. It transformed Kerry Washington from cute inconsequential, baby-momma, black friend into an up-and-coming Hollywood leading-lady hottie.

IT's MAGIC!!

I do find it funny that the black fish out of water (in Finding Forrester) learns to use his brains from white people, while the white fish out of water learns to dance from the black people.


ASHLEY JUDD/MORGAN FREEMAN MOVIES



EVERY SINGLE TIME one of their movies is on TNT, I end up watching it. It really is a puzzling phenomenon.

...They totally should've hooked up. They had MAD chemistry. "The Man" just couldn't handle Morgan being God and hooking up with Ashley Judd.


WILLOW



Finally, the man behind the suit, Warwick Davis gets a starring role. Val Kilmer is in his most awesome role, EVER, and the soundtrack is genuinely hummable.

Willow is my Lucas fantasy of choice.


KRULL



As South Park has clearly demonstrated, the glave is a weapon so badass, even Jesus uses it.

A circle of spinning daggers you can control with your mind? YES, PLEASE!

This movie also has yet another memorable soundtrack. Remember, the music playing during the flight of the thunder-mares?

...Oh. It's just my geeky behind. Whatever. That music rocks, forreal.

Look for Liam Niessen and Hagrid in this too, y'all. ;-) ...I wonder whatever happened to the guy who played the prince?



CLASH OF THE TITANS



Forget the silly mechanical owl, it's all about the Ray Harryhausen-style special effects, Lawrence freak'n Olivier as Zeus, Medusa, and of course, THE KRAKEN!


THE WATERBOY



"h20....GAAAATERADE"

Oh, Sandler...

Elitists hate you. But I suspect they either go home and secretly laugh at your earlier films or they are those no-fun, stuffy people, who enjoy standing around hors d'oeuvres trays, schmoosjhing (how do you spell that?!). Newsflash, not every type of comedy is "high art" and sometimes a fart joke is funny. Learn to enjoy it. And Kathy Bates in this movie? = love.

Do they really doubt your skills? Then why in all of the recent SNL alums, have only you and Mr. Farrell managed to make more than one comedy hit?


...There are at least fifty more, that were left off the list, but pretty much every bad 80's movie, would probably make the cut. So, I may do a Part 2 somewhere down the line.